Saturday, April 12, 2014

Gamer Brain!

           So my week last week consisted of me staying up till 3 and 4 am playing World Of Warcraft up by 6am to go take son to school and get me to school. I have had such a emotional week. RedNeck has been successfully avoided me most of the week except for the 2 times we tried to have intimate relations, The first time he said his chest hurt and just quit... the second time it was less than 2 min and he was done and I was left like a used rag. He never tries to fix these situations which really leaves me feeling useless.

           I have also been sick with a virus most of the week and hurting like someone is stabbing me all week so I have been feeling like something was killing me on top of feeling utterly useless. I have not done any house work and my house looks awful an occational washing of a load of dishes or clothes and thats it all week. 

             My school work has been being done late, I am caught up on that which has been a nightmare. I have to make a excellent grade on my history paper before so I can at least pass that class.. I bombed my final in there... it doesnt help that he does not lecture and he barely goes over the book ever so how am I supposed to know what is on the test when I have never really seen the information. He says read your book but being a mother of 5 who is in 4 other classes besides his, I do not have time to read anything hardly and when I do have a little time all I wanna do is rest from all the school work. With my emotional feelings taking a tole on me I just don't want to do anything but avoid the world and play my WoW.... More to come later I have to get up and move the baby to the bed Break of Motherhood..........................................................................................................................................
2 hours later... moved Monkey off the floor, went to my room and layed on my bed trying to get something from my room and fell asleep too... wake up 30 min later to a crying Monkey he was hot as it is 80+ degrees here today! Monkey wanted to go outside as the wind was blowing and it was actually cooler outside than in my house... I have just come back inside and well now its time to be useless for a few min. Turned on the A/C which RedNeck would have a fit about where he home. Im going to sit right here on the couch and play my Game because that is all I can think about anymore... How much I just want to avoid life and play my game and let the world rush past me... I know this is not being productive and I should clean my house but I just cannot seem to make myself care about cleaning or anything other than avoiding confrontation this month or next.. my dads birthday and mine being this month and dad and mom's Anniversary of their deaths next month. I just shut down to avoid the pain! Anyways enough of my crappy life off to have some carrot swords with my babies (i.e. whole skinny carrots) then play me some WoW for a while before starting gosh knows what for dinner.. 

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