Saturday, November 10, 2012

Introduction to Hell

~~Here Goes Nothing,, This is my first attempts at a Blog so bare with me If your reading this! ~~

      I am a House Wife and Mother  of 5! That's right your not seeing things I have 5 Spawn! 
Oldest is 11 He is my Gamer  so thats what we will call him, Next is my 8 year Old We will call him Artist and he  is a little on the girly side, 5 is my Demon Man he is always starting some kind of fight, Next is my ONLY girl and we will be Calling her DramaQueen she's 3 and The ever more Climbing Monkey is 17 months old! 





Gamer and Artist Live with there dad 90% of the time thanks to the man I am Married to, He is the only one working so when my ex took me back to court He refused to pay for a lawyer so I only get them every 2 weeks for a weekend,,, Kills me!   I have Demon, DramaQueen, and Monkey all the time as I am married to there dad Lets call him Redneck.,

 ~ A Day in My condemned world~

     Typical Monday-Friday I get up at 6am get all 3 of the little ones breakfast because my spawn hate to sleep in!  I make Demon get dressed after fighting with him for 20 minutes to eat so he can make it to school on time. Meanwhile down the hall Redneck sleeps in a nice warm bed (tell after 11am) I get snack and folder tracked down and in Demons hand then I tell Redneck Im leaving he growns rolls over and I leave to take Demon to school.  Usually DramaQueen and Monkey are watching cartoons and eating there breakfast while Im gone! I get home and they usually are upset because Redneck never got up to keep an eye on them and they need Drink, more food, down from the high chair, clean cloths for DramaQueen for wetting the bed! I come in and do whatever they are screaming for try to get coffee on and start cleaning up breakfast that is now all over my kitchen floor!  Monkey under foot and DramaQueen begging for something like Candy or Fruit Snacks which I rarely give in to! I manage to get them calmed and I get me some coffee, Alas I can sit down and have something for me its around 8am by now and DramaQueen screams just as my butt hits the seat I need a DRINKKKKKKK so I put my coffee out of reach of Monkey cuz thats all I need is a burned baby and get her a drink while monkey whines at my feet for a Ba! I ask him to go get his BA cuz by this time he has misplaced it some where! I search the house tell Im exasperated and give in and get a new one out of the cabinet for him get him a drink,,, Ahh back to my coffee.... Ugghhh its COLD and I dont own a microwave it went out over a year ago and RedNeck says No every time I ask for one!     So I sit around 10:30, Drink it cold, get my Itouch and sit down to play my Game a min while DramaQueen and Monkey watch cartoons and play at my feet! Log in to the game only to find some Drama there lol but this is welcomed drama at least if I dont like it I can just close the app and go do something on the computer like Scroll Facebook or check twitter or Pinterest, but this moment of peace is always short lived Kids start fighting wake up Redneck who gets up only to find one of them has gotten in to something I didnt see when I was gone and storms in to the living room yelling at me and the kids,,, Grabs a smoke and takes off back to the bathroom!      We Sit in silence a moment I keep a check on whatever Im doing for me and continue my coffee  which by now is almost empty! I get up to go get a cup and RedNeck meets me at the pot of coffee and asks where is his mug ((LIKE I KNOW ITS YOUR SHIT)) I wait while he gets his so I can get some thats hot and maybe drink it that way I go to sit down and one of the kids need something... Friggggg I could ask RedNeck to do it for them but that just leads to him giving me a dirty look.    Go get kids what they need go to sit down and look at the time Frig it's almost NOON time to make lunch for the kids at least so I make something and put them at the table and High Chair, I get mine and go to sit down but alas one of them has dropped something or is screaming for a drink that I forgot to get before hand UGHHH ok so I go and do that and Lets sit down and eat, RedNeck Looks up at me from his going on second cup of Coffee and says "You Didn't Make me one?"  I give him mine and just sit back down with my now cold second cup and my iTouch and play a little on the game and kinda watch whatever he has changed it to that is making the kids scream cuz cartoons arent on where they can see them any more!  Kids start fussing there done and need cleaned up,,,I ask RedNeck to take care of them a min so I can have my coffee and he looks at me and blow's in Exasperation.  I take my half drank cold coffee pour it down the drain and clean them up. Its time to start cleaning on my now messy house and kitchen which hasnt been spotless in MONTHS since I never have any help as the kids are not old enough and Im raising a 6th child! I clean no stop for about 2 hours I sit to rest and kids are screaming and fussy its nap time and they want mommy to get them a cup and lay them down so I get back up and do that Maybe Now that they are napping I can have a rest,,, Nope think again its almost 2:30pm and I realize I still havent properly dressed myself UGHHH so I go to the back of the house get dressed  and head out the door Demon will be out of school in 10min.... Rush to get him and PRAY that he got a good color as I dont wanna here RedNeck scream at him. Sit in the line at school for 20 min to pick him up, come home. HOME Sweet Screaming kids, RedNeck is screaming at the kids and they are screaming in terror for some reason. Jezze so I try to defuse the situation and make DramaQueen and Demon go outside to play with neighbors, who always give my kids something they are not allowed to have or spray them with something funky smelling. Meanwhile Mokey is screaming OUTSIDE OUTSIDE OUTSIDE at the top of his lungs and I dont blame him one bit! I get him in something he can play in and outside we go.  30 minutes outside and he is running off I gotta go chase him I realize its time to make dinner before RedNeck goes to work UGH I forgot to defrost something so I think to my self Quick what is something that doesnt take long from frozen to plate. I come up with something and by this time kids are fussing and going on about cups and food and he took this and she took that and neighbor girls being mean again.(( lets call her Clepto as her mom has been teaching her to steal and Lie for years! She is same age as Demon and in the same class. ))  I have to deal with it cuz RedNeck has his Headphones on watching something on the comp or watching TV and doesnt even here me ask for help. I deal with the kids and deal with dinner and get them plates and cups and sit down with me a plate of food by now while I was cooking RedNeck has gotten ready for work and had him a shower and it smiling at me like he's having the best day ever,,,, REALLY MAN?  So I get done eating just in time for him to be telling everyone bye and out the door he goes 45min early for work. I start cleaning up dinner plates and kids are running around me screaming about something! I tell Demon to go run his bath, Monkey is Screaming and crying he's ready to get down I run him to the bath before it gets to high in water and quick bathe him while he screams at me and I fight not to drop the Monkey in the bath get him done fight him to dry him, daiper him and dress him while he screams Night Night BaBaBaBaaaaaa I get him a bottle of milk and lay him down ((please dont judge He wont sleep with paci, water in Ba or nothing he just screams for hours)) go back to wash demons hair and Fight with him to get out of the tub so DramaQueen can get in Meanwhile she is at my heals screaming at him as well!   He gets dressed and I give him a hug and tell him goodnight but he runs around like a wild child until I threaten to make him sleep with no TV then he goes and lays down! I go back to check on DramaQueen and wash her hair and fight with her for 10 min cuz she doesnt wanna get out! Make her get out and go to bed and at Last I can have mommy time!  Look around and its awful but Im to tired to fix it I grab my iTouch lock up and go lay down!  I play my game like 10 minutes before I pass out iTouch in hand. RedNeck is supposed to be home around midnight when he works through the week but at some time I wake up to go to the bathroom its like 3am and he's home but drinking a beer watching something or playing a game,, I go back to bed and some time between 5am and 6 he comes to bed and it starts all over again!

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